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Thursday, January 03, 2019

Figuring out my in-between status

Yuck. Doing some review of last year once again was looking at decent visits to this blog, with Google Analytics saying had visitors from 57 countries. While also I noted my financial struggles last year were major. So am still in-between where the attention levels can draw globally have not connected to me making money.

Have puzzled for YEARS over this in-between state where at least now I believe the data, while back over a decade ago was just puzzled. And then the number was given was 125 countries for my math blog. So it was even more mysterious.

Now though realize there are not payment intermediaries of which am aware for my particular ways of drawing attention. Where talked payment intermediaries a bit with my post of an idea marketplace.

But like you go to a store, which is a payment intermediary by these ideas, where you can buy products. Or you have products at a store that people can buy. And is more rare to sell products direct to customers.

The store is in-between showing expertise in product selection--what ends up on the shelves. And in bringing in customers and providing for their needs while also facilitating them paying for things.

For services, a person trades skills and time with an employer for pay, where typically that employer is in some business position above that employee.

Have noted wryly to myself more than once when have greater reach than a company. Which is a real thing. I may NOT have figured out how to make money with my global reach but I have learned how to use for influence.

But it's just common sense, if some guy can pull attention from 50+ countries across multiple categories year after year after year, then probably I know a few things, you know?

Where is like, and what am I doing fancy? I use Blogger, and tweet a lot, but...and have an Instagram where I barely post. And some other things where am not looking to use latest whatever.

Even my open source project is over 14 years old and will be 15, this February.  So yeah I DO wonder at times how I not only keep drawing global attention but maintain the levels.

I catch myself tweaking things at times. Trying to figure out my own process.

And of course I've learned ways to leverage that attention various ways.

Just the money solution has eluded me.

So am still stuck in-between. AT least realize that the web enables the global reach and it is real. And it is impressive to draw attention from 50+ countries year after year after year. It even lets me maybe impact positively for people I think are under-promoted.

Of course am sure web will evolve to where any person who can draw attention on my scale will be able to make money some kind of way, as shows value in content. But current systems to me either are inadequate or involve folks I call money people in a way I find scary.

Meanwhile have to make a living. And now have a vehicle of opportunity, as was given one, but is also more pressure to maintain. And do NOT want to end up homeless again, and never want to need to go to a shelter again.

So what to do? Can focus on finding a company that can handle all of the above, which is what will do. While thinking more about the payment intermediaries who will one day transform the globe, as the web takes proper place in the global economy.

Just wish more of them were already here.

Is fascinating to me how I was trapped so long ago by those web stats. Was massively global at the start of my awareness of even having any kind of global position at 100+ countries and has been that way for over a decade now.

Yeah awareness from web companies giving those stats. Still rely much on Google, like most often still reference Google Analytics as is convenient.

May as well believe it--am global.

Even when I try to just walk away from it, as I can just not think about it, like to say, reality warps around me. I effect change and affect things around me just by being there. And rarely is there much negative for me, but that is not always true for others. So I have a responsibility for many reasons. Must face the best of my attention reality, and surmount what obstacles remain between me and financial stability.


James Harris

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