Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Chasing inspiration from challenge

Talking more openly on several things has helped me a lot, really in facing objectively, and trying to figure out more. And occurs to me should give more context to help curious people make sense of things that can seem odd I would think, like my continuing global reach.

Why exactly could one person draw so much attention from so much of the world, so consistently for so long?

So do explain much of what I figure is why, in what follows but want to emphasize, to me is just a cool story. Which keeps getting more interesting. Of course is also my story. And I like it.

To me for a long time it was about math, but more recently I got data that challenged that view which was kind of a relief. And about the math will explain a bit more that one thing I did years ago, was notice a way to write a mathematical argument, which looks correct by established rules, which another mathematical argument can prove is incorrect by those same rules. And I wrote a paper and worked at getting it published until that happened. So at that point I had made history. To me it was really cool and I prepared myself for global attention and there was to be follow-up papers I presumed, with help from mathematicians I was confident I would get.

Then math journal's chief editor tried deleting it out of electronic journal after publication. Journal managed one more edition then shutdown. University which had hosted journal scrubbed all mention of it from its websites. And I pondered that things weren't going way I thought.

Still was a neat trick. Probably will be only person in human history to do it dramatic that way, because of the problem I found. So to me? Was an opportunity I could not pass up! And problem is STILL there by the way. Means in mathematics someone could write something that passes ALL the checks as correct in place now, which is actually wrong. Will be handled properly someday, I'm sure.

And it's JUST information regardless.

That wasn't the only time was challenged by an unexpected response, as back in 1996 had a paper rejected as too simple by a math journal and I didn't push it back then. Well I was only 26, and there I found a simple way to solve a problem that was around 2000 years old, and in fact even Sir Isaac Newton had a crack at it. But supposedly it got solved recently in a complex computer aided proof so complex I'm not sure they've finished checking it (I think they have not wanting to web search to be sure). To me? Easier to just figure, well I can't see anything wrong with my idea but why worry about it? If I'm right it's not like answer will change.

And decided to challenge myself with such things to test myself with the simple idea: if I'm right, what else can I do?

Rather than focus on convincing others, became intrigued with convincing myself not with thoughts, but with accomplishments, in the real world. But how to know? Would figure it out.

To me had this unique opportunity to consider myself abstractly and ask myself what I would do if could have access to someone who could do such things? And that makes for an excellent adventure.

Eventually got tired of mathematicians sitting on things with the silent treatment as did other things, and wandered off into other areas. And also began to study how they were succeeding! Like that way I found to produce a seemingly correct math paper which is wrong? That is a BIG DEAL. Will admit have monitored mathematicians slightly to see if they dared recently claim a big proof in certain areas where I know it would allow a fake result to look correct. Will not say if it has been exploited before as that gets into harder areas.

But you can see how easy it is under current world systems to hold me in check if I'm the ONE person noting such things. For instance reporters go to the experts, and I'm NOT a mathematician. I just happen to have some mathematical discoveries.

But of course if others can just check and see then that would keep attention draw in place. And my results ARE easy to check by people with mathematical training. But most people don't have that training or even like math. So you can see yeah is easy to hold the status quo, if others who know are silent.

My estimates are low-ball ones for global attention on purpose.

Chasing inspiration became fun for me as I gained the opportunity to endlessly challenge myself with the freedom to go wherever my interests took me, with a feeling there was a point to it bigger than myself.

Guess people all over the world do notice in some way. I've grown used to knowing there will be that interest. And why wouldn't there be?

So yeah, I defined mathematical proof in a functional way because I needed to check my mathematical arguments without being able to just have mathematicians say good or not. And came up with a functional definition of science because was frustrated at how people were talking climate science. And defined entertainment to help me explain follower counts on social media.

Studying much I've learned far more than especially if back in 1996 had faced global recognition and headlines around the world about the hard to explain thing. Or even back in 2003, when a crushing weight of attention could have been there with a world pondering the meaning of a massive flaw with established mathematical ideas, which I should add just needed what I see as a little tweak. Um yeah did come up with a fix for the problem. So fun but too esoteric to explain here.

That is SO much where the fun is, when you get to fix things!!!

No way would miss that opportunity either. Worked hard at it too. Figuring out the fix. Seems like a lifetime ago now. But really was about different ways of looking at things more than the years.

Now far older at 47, and with far less energy with which to chase, am rather happy with how things have worked for me at least. Challenge was inspiring, and I would not give up the knowledge I have now.

And I wonder how could I have found it, any other way.

Oh yeah, so being more transparent about it all. Through the years have tried many ways to explain. And now will admit am less concerned with what might work to convince. It does feel good to just talk it.

Will admit though, would be nice to resolve it. Still amazes me, especially certain things. Study it as I might, and with SO many answers still puzzles remain.

And can see is such a wild story can be hard to process let alone discuss, and I lived through those things. Had a lot of fun too along the way should add. Sure at times was really stressed or felt tested, but to me was an opportunity.

Where would answering the challenges take me? Still curious.

James Harris
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